Are you easily intimated?

February 13, 2017 No Comments by Tess Aisthorpe

Are you more likely to be inspired or intimidated when you find yourself in the presence of someone who is much better than you at something? We get that it will depend on circumstances, it’s interesting to think about how the talent of others can affect our sense of ourselves and what we can do.

We are writing this as it’s something we have been reflecting on lately. When you see someone really awesome doing something that you would like to do, there’s that fine line between feeling inspired (Maybe I can do that if I work at it!) or intimidated (I’m not worthy to be in the same gym, on the same course, at the same place…).

Almost all of us have experienced this at some point in our lives. We feel like we’re doing really well at something and then someone steals our thunder by being way better.

We are all expected to start somewhere right? Something’s better then nothing. You are expected to be learning, starting out, trying new things, rather than showing mastery immediately. It doesn’t matter if you come first or last, we are all learning & we all have our own strengths & weaknesses.

On the inspiration side…there’s a push in the direction of possibility. Inspiration is all about what we imagine we might be capable of. Why? Because we are pretty damn sure that we are never going to look like supermodels. So you won’t see pictures of lean, mean, slender, flawless models at our gym…how are these going to get us imagining real possibilities for ourselves?

We are most likely to feel intimidated when we start to compare our beginner or early days self to someone who has loads of experience. Or when we compare what we do, with our 2-3 times a week effort, to what someone else does who works at it (whatever “it” may be) for hours and hours a week.

It’s human nature to feel a mixture of intimidation and inspiration. When we’re thrown into the same all-levels groups with people who are more experienced…it’s jarring for sure. But it’s also amazing to watch someone being able to do something with ease…it’s pretty cool…Inspiring even.

Sometimes we’re the beginner, and other times we have the experience. Learning new movements/exercises in the gym is a bit like traveling to a new place for us. When we travel, we all love that feeling of getting to know a new place. But we also know that after a few days, what seemed unfamiliar loses its ‘foreignness’. In no time at all, we’ve got our bearings, fav spots, some sense of local culture etc. But just because you didn’t know how to get somewhere on day one and you had to stop and ask someone, doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you. It doesn’t mean you give up. It doesn’t have to be intimidating to be surrounded by people who know more and can do “it” better.

Treating these experiences as inspiring can help to improve feelings of low self-esteem & give your own confidence a boost to keep focussed on yourself & to always work at it.